i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
