turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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