I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
