Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
