No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
