Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
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