I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
