dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
