wakey wakey hands off snakey
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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