Dual....:-)
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
