Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize