This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
