i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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