i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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