oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Randomize
