well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
