Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
