My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Randomize
