make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
