This house was built for laser tag.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
