wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
