I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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