Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
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