We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
