my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
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