You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
she looked like the before picture.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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