i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
