So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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