oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
