Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
