I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
