He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
