PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
