i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
