New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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