My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
