Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
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