Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
