It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize