He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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