I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
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