I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
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