I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
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