You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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