I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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