Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize