Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
