belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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