You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
Randomize
