just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
