I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize