she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize